Confession

It's my birthday. I wish it wasn't.

I don't feel like celebrating.

I don't want to slap on the "happy face" and act all excited.

I don't want to answer the phone or see my email box full of Facebook notices about all the people who wrote on my "wall".

I don't want to figure out where to go for dinner, or how to spend my birthday money. It's just more pressure to make more decisions.

I don't want to pretend it's a special day when it really isn't: there's still work to do, laundry to put away, dishes to be washed, food to prepare, chauffering to do. Life still has to go on. I can't put everything on hold just because it's my "special day".

Birthday is just one more "to do" this year. I'd rather make it a "to don't". That's what I really want for my birthday. A day off. From EVERYthing. Every social obligation, work obligation, family obligation, home obligation, decision obligation, church obligation, a day off from my To Do list.

I feel like such a jerk because people are genuinely wishing me a good day and I just want it all to go away.

I'm such a cow. Moo.